Ya....
I finally know my target now already....
I still don't know my target actually when I come here....
Maybe just finish my diploma course....
Then go for advance diploma course....
And lastly go for a top-up of degree at Australia...

Until yesterday....
After chatting with Wil bond...
I finally know my target....
I will finish the above things....
And the main is....
I will prove to them....
I'm strong....
Strong enough to prove to them that I can do it just like them....
And maybe to exceed them....
Just like that....

Many have hurt me by asking me to go back for hometown and appear at the HAC....
(HAC=Hari Anugerah Cemerlang which is a kind of prizes giving day where prizes are given by Yang DiPertuan Agong....and also shake hand with majesty...)
Ya....
I'm honest....
I didn't get good results last year at the SPM and so on....
This make me unable to get the chance to nearly see majesty....
It was an honour to go for that....
Smile...
Get on the flash of the camera....
And maybe your face will appear at the newspaper and even TV3.....

They always ask me to go back....
But do they ever think of my feelings???
What for I go back???
To emberassed myself there???
By showing the teachers that I got the high maintanance of face to see them and laugh like a stupid????
What for....

I ignore many of them who asked me that question....
Hurt....
Damn hurt....
Yesterday somebody say to me....
"That's why larh you got so few A's in SPM...."
I endure with that....
Hurt you know???

On that moments start....
I know....
I am just a stupid on their eyes....
Because cannot win them....
Because unable to do well in the past...
Ya....
I'm stupid....
But as a person....
I still have the feelings....

I have make sure with myself that night....
I want to prove to them that I'm not stupid as they thought...
I must prove to them...
I cannot lose to them again....
Or not they will just laugh at me and say I'm stupid forever....

Today morning....
One of my team friend told me somethings and make me frustrated with her....
I comment on her....
She told me that she don't want to continue the course if the first semester's result was bad....
I just shocked and directly comment on her....
"You just will lose all your dream by let go of this...."
"Just don't because of a little turn and makes you let go...."
She says she have already decided with her mother....
She says "I know my level...I just feel that I won't pass..."
"At least you go and try before you give up...Me come here is to study and want to prove to my friends in Alor Star that I'm not stupid....I will prove to them...."I said to her....Quite in a angry mood....
She don't know is shocked because of my angry....
She says she will try....

Sometimes....
People will hurt others accidentally....
But....
Think carefully before says somethings out....
Because that will cause somebody to heart break...
Deeply hurt....
And maybe untreatable....

I will prove to you all....
I will....
And I must....

~Be Happy Forever~
~Be Prove Forever~